Sabado, Enero 18, 2014

Hiding Behind the Frowns

What makes you happy rightnow is the most difficult question to be answered when you are nothing butanother lonely soul -- when you are nil but a weary dreamer whose aims seem to bedistant enough for you to make giving up as an option.

As a young lady who still hasso many bridges to cross before arriving at the palace of her desires, I beginasking myself. Why do I live fain when there is pain? What makes me happy rightnow when what I earnestly want is too far from me? What gives me bliss if mydreams were out of reach? If my best was not enough? If no one notices what Iam capable of? I stop for a moment, then I come up with a realization.

I am in raptures now because Irupture in tears almost every night. I am glad today because God is giving me away by showing no way. He crumbles me to keep me whole. He gives me struggles forme to be able to collect weapons that I can use during the next few battles. Heallows me to stay a loser for me to be a winner later. He weakens me to make mestrong. He eliminates my hope for my faith to last long. He ruins the roads to successto prepare my feet that are going to pass the broken path known as failure --which leads todirectly to the place of victory. He darkens the night for me todance under the daylight tomorrow.

I know that I should refrainfrom wailing and forget about my complains. I know, despite these trials, thatI am truly blessed because I can still manage to laugh -- to relish the world withreal joy coming from my heart. I do not have to feign for the merriment is true.I do not need to close my eyes because the reason behind every chagrin is rightin front of me.

And, yes, I am happy becauseI am sad right now. I know my Lord very well, he mastered the art of wrappingthe most beautiful things using the ugliest hand-made covers of failure.

[June 2013]

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